Hypocrites

I can't help but laugh at the irony when a man who spends 15 minutes lecturing people on religion then tries to cheat his way out of a measly Rs.25 highway toll....hypocrites!

Last resting place

After 23 years of dreading it I finally decided to pay him a visit. See in my family we don't talk about anything bad that happened and death is a topic completely avoided...consequently graveyards are a place avoided completely also. I don't know how the thought came into my head....I was nearby the place and suddenly I felt this urge to see him...I can't explain it. So I went...the place was different from when I last went....just a year after he had passed but I remembered the layout....I remembered where to go. Walking towards the place I realized how long it had been....how no one had bothered to come here in 23 years....I am the first in the family to go there after that initial year.

I suppose I was naive to think that a grave left unattended for over 20 years would still be there...it wasn't but I found the spot...as I realized it was gone I couldn't hold back...as I write this I still can't hold back. We shouldn't have left him there all these years alone....I guess I always believed that the body is just a vessel that doesn't hold any significance after the soul is gone but being there....at the place he last rested I felt close to him. I sat there and talked to him....asked him for forgiveness....remembered the last days we spent....told him I loved him and missed him...things that I have been saying to his images for years. But saying them there in that place was different in some way.

I suppose not going there for so long enhanced the sense of not accepting that he was gone....I don't know if having gone there now will help me overcome this. Spending 30 minutes there in that place he was once resting, I wondered if I am anything like you had hoped that I would be....I suppose I'll never know that. I will never know if I make you proud or if you forgive me for having never visited him in all these years....I hope you do....I swear I never even once spent a day without thinking of you and how much I miss not having you there.

Let down

After years of putting up with all their troubles and mess....when you finally reach out to them for not help but maybe compassion and understanding....you're faced with cynicism and sarcasm. Your family isn't supposed to let you down like this....they are supposed to be there for you and support you when you're down...not kick you further. Who do you turn to now? You're in a corner again....a corner you've been in before...when noone would have understood...

Oblivious

Nights spent in the comfort of other travellers of the same road you're on....they can be so relaxing. For a moment you forget the journey you're on and the treacherous twists that fate has in store for you on this road and you are lost in the company of another who is doing the same. We choose to remain oblivious to reality...we choose to kep our heads in the ground so as not to see the rising tide.

People and times

I've never believed in the right time for the right person....but what happens when you meet the right person at the wrong time.......

Misinterpreted games

People who play hard to get need to realize that there's a fine line between keeping someone's interest by playing the game and giving the impression of low interest. The line is blurry and often crossed unintentionally and by the time you realize that it was crossed.....too late!

Aren't we too old to play these games now

Juggling

I wonder what it is about me that loves juggling....juggling people is certainly not easy nor is it a good thing in the end to toy with all of them. Still.....why is it that I never stop?