Forgivable

I've always kept things to myself more than sharing with those around me. That said, posting about my thoughts online is hardly in keeping with my personality but then again this isn't the same as discussing things with family or friends. My mother thinks that I need to open up more and share what's going on in my head.....of all the people :) I know she feels bad for everything that's happening....and she feels it's all because of her choice. Truth be told it totally is but I can't bear to actually tell her that I believe it to be so. She's given up so much for me....22 years she's dedicated to making my life better. One mistake is forgivable....I suppose.

I don't want any more closeness.....I don't want anyone to know the mess that is in my head....I'm tired of trying to confide in someone and then finding out that the person will just use it to humiliate me. I'm tired of all the issues....I'm just so tired.