Not so regular anymore

It's when you do the regular things that you realise how different they are now. Sundays without having had a call with her.....travelling without having her excited about where you're going.....even things like not having a draw to the house that was ours. Perhaps it will take a lot more time to get accustomed to this new life...a life where I feel I don't have her around to want the best for me and to see me happy. I know she was happy with me but in my heart I know I never did enough to repay all she did for me......this will haunt me forever,